Pre-Qualified Mates
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Official PreQM Blog

To Do & What Not To Do in Dating. That is the Question. If it was only that easy. Where is Shakespeare when you need him? This is the official blog of PreQualified Mates, PreQM.

 

 

Get Off Your F'ing Phone!..

What is it with our addiction to our phones? A total copout & a crutch…

Is all that swiping giving you carpal tunnel? The Dating Apps have created a culture of narcissism. The truly unfortunate thing about narcissism is that there's no cure for it. God help you if you get it! Worse yet, if you fall for a narcissist. Reducing photos of love prospects to a nanosecond’s glance. These thumb motions ultimately represent a huge “thumbs down.”

I hear the criticisms and they are brutal. Do we want to portray a superficial character when we are trying to impress a potential partner? Is anyone looking for that? Well, yes, in many cases. The sources of the derogatory comments are the real irony. I want to say, "look hard in the mirror & see what you bring to the table." But, Miss Chatterbox here usually keeps her mouth shut in these instances.

I went to a Christmas party with my husband in San Francisco with 3000 to 4000 of the hottest singles (well, mostly, singles cuz I was there). As an outgoing, Founder of a dating site, I'm extremely proactive in social situations. I smile, extend my hand, & introduce myself with my full name & card. What an original concept?

Hey, this is California, dude. Frankly, I use dude so often, sometimes people think I'm a guy. In all candor, I didn't always use my full name cause I couldn't stand my maiden name! But, I digress.

 

Yes, I do try to present the best first impression that I can. I’ve been in sales & sales leadership my entire career. In my prior career as a sales director, I had a reputation of making "Dress for Success" required reading.

So, yeah, I know look pretty hot, at times, & people are fairly receptive to me.

It's actually somewhat mind-blowing. They are practically DESPERATE to strike up a conversation.

Back to the party. All these singles are looking at their phones to avoid actual interacting. The aging sorority girls taking innumerable posed selfies & group photos, one after the other, with their dated poses. I'm sure they were having fun, but they did miss some hotties and potentially interesting opportunities. It takes quite a bit of courage to bust up a large group of hyper, self-centered posers & make a move.

I recently hosted an event with an awesome DJ. We were having a blast, partying on the Patio at the Four Seasons. At some point, I needed to hit the ladies room. I walked through the virtually empty bar & noticed a man, alone, at 11 PM drinking a martini & staring at his laptop. Reminded me of my husband with his martini in tow.

I said "hi" and looked at his screen. Match.com. I said, "Are you single (duh)?" He said, "Yes." I'm sure he thought I was coming on to him. I said, "I'm hosting a singles party right out there...come on out and hang out & meet some people for real, in person." What a concept? Eye contact? OMG! Yet, wild horses couldn't drag him out there. Ooh, scary shit meeting someone for real.