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Official PreQM Blog

To Do & What Not To Do in Dating. That is the Question. If it was only that easy. Where is Shakespeare when you need him? This is the official blog of PreQualified Mates, PreQM.

 

 

There is No Such Thing as a Stupid Question. Bull shit!

As the founder of a dating site, I speak with people all day and night about dating. Mind-boggling & mind-numbing. Fascinating, tragic, upsetting, erotic, funny, shocking. The things I’ve heard. Sounds slightly Dr. Seuss-like, but not!

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Some daters ask the most insignificant questions prior to meeting people. Practically as ridiculous as, “what’s the blood type of your middle child?” Are you kidding? Rarely do they ask questions to determine the basics, like if they’re even nice.

It got me thinking about the really stupid questions people have asked me before I was supposed to meet them for the first date.

Often, the pre-date killers. No pre-gaming here. Complete non-starters. Mostly, cuz they have no game.

This one guy asked me “who initiated your divorce?” I’m like, “Really?” We never made it to a 2nd question.

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What would you wear to turn me on?

Another winner. I was on a dating site & had to go through this whole rigmarole before connecting with this guy. He asked me, “what would you wear when we meet to turn me on?” He didn’t even appear to be anywhere near the hot realm in his photo. And, I’m not exactly Sienna Sinclaire.

Both of those guys were never married and pushing 50. Big surprise. Not exactly 20 somethings. Doubtful that they ever even had relationships lasting over 3 months.

I decided to run a little questionnaire. A really short one. We received a lot of responses. OMG. You can’t make up this shit.

What was the most inappropriate question anyone asked you before you met them for a first date?”[1]

Are Men from Mars and Women from Venus as John Gray says? Seems it’s more about wanting Sex from Women & Money from Men

Here are the top 10 stupid questions:

  1. Do you want to get laid and see where it goes? A: I think we all pretty much know where it’s supposed to go.

  2. Can we be friends with benefits? A: I’m sorry I think you texted the wrong person. I’m not your hooker.

  3. I’m changing meeting for drinks. Why don’t you stop by my place after you have dinner? A: WFT, I’m not a free booty call.

  4. What size are your breasts? And…I’ve seen your picture. Are your boobs a 38 DDD? A: What size is your dick?

  5. Someone was asked a trifecta: What is your sexual preference? Are you sexually promiscuous? Do you believe in open relationships? A: I understand what you may be trying to do. Here is a suggestion. Let's back up and start with reintroducing ourselves and just enjoy each other's company.

  6. How often do you masturbate? Another, when was the last time you had sex? And another, have you ever had a threesome? A: Alrighty then… 

  7. Do you like strip clubs?

  8. Are you a virgin? She said that one took the cake.

  9. Could I pay you to have my baby? And then, the guy continued to name the price.

  10. How is your English so good? A: I’m American

I beg your pardon, but, by chance, do you have a black card?

Many men said that they were asked questions about their income. Specifically, “how much money do you make?” 

One guy said that common irritants are: “Wow, I think you make a lot of money. What do you drive? Are those pictures really of you? Is your reported age accurate?

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Guilty. When my 1st marriage failed, I met a Rod at a dinner featuring producers from a recent Pixar movie. Fun. My bro nicknamed Rod “Cheesecake.” I know. He’s not fat. He just baked a LOT of cheesecakes. Honestly, I’m surprised that my niece is straight after meeting him way back when. I digress.

I was recently separated. That’s an understatement. My husband was still living in the house with me. But, I waited til the day he moved out for our 1st date. Nice, right? Anyway, in California, you have to complete an Asset/Debt form when you divorce. In our case, thanks to my ridiculous attorney, I think we redid that form a couple of dozen times at an exorbitant cost. Quelle nightmare.

Rod was 46, BS from Princeton & MBA from Booth at U Chicago. And never married. I was a complete rebounder (understatement) and we both knew it.

I teased Rod that I wouldn’t date anyone unless they submitted an Asset/Debt form. It was so cute. We were on the beach at my family’s place in Tahoe. He takes this huge file out of his beach bag & had a really sweet smile on his face. He hands me a homemade Asset Debt report. I told him that I really didn’t care, but I did glance & it was 7 figures. Nice, Rod! Woo hoo. lol.

“How much money do you make?” continued…

A: I am financially comfortable and no, I do not live with my mom in her basement. I am sorry, but I am not materialistic.
A: I was nice about it and said, “That’s something to discuss on around the 10th date…”
Q: Or after telling the person my job, she asked Are you an employee or do you own the business?” He thought she was a gold digger. Ya think? 
Q: I don’t want to get remarried, but would you be willing to sign a pre-nup? A: Huh? Aren’t we getting a little ahead of ourselves here?

Then, there are those who start grilling you about your occupation.

Q: “Are you the kind of lawyer who handles cases, like, when your kid gets bit on the lip by a dog?
A:  “Yes.”

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They spoke for a while about the dog bite. Then, she abruptly terminated the conversation. He thought he would never meet her. I married him.

It’s not always what you ask
It’s how you ask
And when you ask
And if you’ve got
Any game.

[1] The follow up questions were: 2) What was your reaction and/or response, 3) Did you meet this person, 4) Did you have a 2nd date, and 5) What is your gender?