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Official PreQM Blog

To Do & What Not To Do in Dating. That is the Question. If it was only that easy. Where is Shakespeare when you need him? This is the official blog of PreQualified Mates, PreQM.



How do You Get in the Mood (When you Really are Not)?

What’s on your playlist?

Since Bo Rhap, I’ve been loving Queen. Really, for the first time. You want to get into the mood? Wanna get pumped up to get into a relationship? Listen to this. A lot. Play the Game. I love it & I agree.

This is your life
Don’t play hard to get
It’s a free, free world
All you have to do is fall in love
Play the game
Play the game of love

I’m not suggesting to fall in love with everyone you date. As Daisy Bernard says, talk about “getting the ick, quick.” Ugh. Frankly, quite the opposite.

But, get ready. Look good. Inside and out. Get yourself pumped up. Get the good pheromones flowing. If you really don’t want to be alone, don’t play too hard to get.

Have you made the best killer playlist? It's free to do!


Setting the mood for love is one of the oldest moves in the book

Culturally speaking, using music to affect your mood sets the stage. Maybe, because it actually works!

There are so many playlists out there. I could make a playlist of all the playlists!

The Workout
✅The Make Out Session
✅The Pump-You-Up
✅The Chill Out
✅The Wake-Up
✅The Good Vibes

I even made a playlist exclusively for road trips with my dad.

My dad was one of those guys who liked to go on drives. He loved “This Guy’s in Love with You” by Herb Alpert. Dudes love that song probably cuz he was a handsome, talented guy who could sing & play the trumpet. That’s also code for “he’s good with his hands and mouth.” 😉

One day, my dad, my husband, and I walked into my parents’ home singing it like lounge lizards at full blast. We were several-glasses-of-wine happy. If you knew my dad, you’d understand why his giddiness and singing were so astonishing. My mother and the household help were staring at us with their mouths open. He simply was not the kind of guy to ever walk around singing.

What happened? Modern mixology at its best!

One part wine mixed with one part Dad’s Roadtrip Playlist!


What do you listen to when you’re getting ready? Or getting pumped up? Do you have a go-to soundtrack before work?

You should see my husband in the morning—or, on second thought, maybe you shouldn’t. lol. He plays Pandora. He sings and dances. He asks our dog, Bentley, to dance with him. When my husband’s not looking, I give 👎🏻 to all the Eagles songs that pop up on his favorite station. I’m with the Dude on this one. I hate the fucking Eagles and my husband knows it. But it works for him. It gets him going. And he kills it in court.

How do you get in the mood when you are not in it?

When I get ready, I listen to upbeat, danceable music. Lucky me, I’ve got good lighting and awesome mirrors at my disposal. Getting ready—going from a 1 to a 10 (in energy level and presentation)—is not always easy. It takes a lot of energy, to the point where I’ve considered whether snorting matcha would work.

When you need a boost, a killer playlist can help

But when you need to hit the gym, or when you’ve got to get energized before a date, a kickass playlist really can work wonders. Especially, if you’re wavering about following through. Or, if you are really trying not to flake.

Rocking out might be the most time-efficient and cost effective mood-booster there is. When 20-something-year-old me was living in Opera Plaza in the City, the security guards’ heads would spin from how quickly I could transform from the sweaty gym rat to the best hottie that I could be, or from road warrior to dinner-date ready. One of the security guards even told me he wished his wife could take lessons on how to get ready so fast. Tunes were one of my tricks.

And for those of you who didn’t end up landing those leading roles in your high school’s musicals, you’re in luck! Singing can improve your mood, even if you suck at it. According to Stacy Horn, “it may be from endorphins, hormones associated with feelings of pleasure. Or…from oxytocin, …released during singing…found to alleviate anxiety and stress. Oxytocin also enhances feelings of …. bonding, which may explain why…singing lessens feelings of depression and loneliness.”


What’s wrong with that? Stay clear of the darkside!

All you yogis out there will be glad to know that the restorative power of singing is echoed in your chakra.

Listen to music. Let your heart sing. Dance. Find what moves you. Shake your booty!

Let us know. What’s on your playlist and why?

And once you’re feeling it, Nibble on this from our friends from Jen Reviews out of New Zealand.